I believe letting go is the most difficult mindful attitude to develop for highly emotional people. Somehow we get attached even for the tiniest reason and since we usually connect through the heart, letting go becomes painful… it feel like our heart is literally breaking.
So whenever people need to leave for whatever reason it’s a big struggle for us, but to keep a minimum of peace inside we need to let them go and realise that people are like the waves. They come and go, because that’s the natural flow, and in order to keep this flow going a wave needs to go so another one can come and meet the shore.
Some are lucky enough to embrace it more easily than others though, but this particular attitude takes time to nurture and grow. Mastering it requires a real understanding of the fact that we can’t force or impose our will to others, we can’t control anyone else but us. We may love and cherish them very much, but that doesn’t mean they feel the same way or that they want to share the same heart space as we wish.
Thus we also need to be humble and put our ego aside. The pain of letting go really comes from our difficulty of becoming selfless and egoless. We feel pain because we are focused in our expectations and wills, not feeling others’ wishes and feelings. If they need to leave, it’s their choice and we are no one to step into someone’s freedom.
The good thing of letting go is that the more we grow the easier it becomes to practise it. At some point, we just wake up and decide that letting go is actually less painful than trying to hold on tightly to someone that needs to break free. Just like the waves.